Friday, August 14, 2015

For Anyone Who Has Been Personally Victimized By Mario Kart's Blue Shell

I’d rather get blue balled than blue shelled.

Dear mystical and deviant blue shell,

Dear mystical and deviant blue shell,

Thinkstock / Nintendo

Before you came into our lives in Mario Kart 64, cruising around in first place was an empowering and rewarding feeling.

Before you came into our lives in Mario Kart 64, cruising around in first place was an empowering and rewarding feeling.

Nintendo

IT WAS CELEBRATORY! And as it should be! You dodged rogue green shells and cleverly placed bananas to earn the coveted first place position.

IT WAS CELEBRATORY! And as it should be! You dodged rogue green shells and cleverly placed bananas to earn the coveted first place position.

Nintendo

Then, in 1996, you reared your spiky exterior and blew it all up — LITERALLY.

Then, in 1996, you reared your spiky exterior and blew it all up — LITERALLY.

youtube.com?v=uKZYi-wpSxI / Nintendo

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